65: How Do You Know When Your Child’s Disorder Is More Than Just Neurodiversity?

Liza (Host) 00:00:39
Happy day. Welcome to Very Happy Stories. All right, I'm about to share my interview with the soul shine mom herself, Cece Davis. Wow. Okay. So who was CC? Well, I would say she is one of the most resilient moms I know. She's actually a certified wellness and mindset coach, and she really needed that certification to get through the journey that she's been on. Her number one client herself. Yes, she had to coach herself to get through her daughter's journey. It's a very similar story to my own, especially CC's story. And actually, her daughter's story sounds a lot like my own, in that we thought we just had neurodivergent kids, you know, kids with ADHD or autism, dyslexia, dyscalculia, dysgraphia. And the next thing you know, this list end up being two pages, and you really find yourself in the world of special needs. She got to the root cause of her daughter's disorder, and it's not unfamiliar to me, and she did land in this pans pandas community. She's going to share with you her story, but even more than that, really, the mindset there is a part of the journey where you just shift, and she is going to tell you all the things that she did to help herself and help her daughter. This is Cece's very happy story. Happy day. Welcome Cece to very Happy Stories.

CC (Guest) 00:02:26
Thank you so much. It's a pleasure to be here.

Liza (Host) 00:02:30
I am so excited to have this conversation with you. You know, there's a lot of people that I follow on social media and that follow me, but there's only a few people that really, truly understand exactly.

CC (Guest) 00:02:47
What I'm living through.

Liza (Host) 00:02:48
And you are, like, one of those very few mamas that gets it and has gotten out. So I am out of, like, the really, really, really hard time, and so I can't wait to share you with my audience.

CC (Guest) 00:03:04
Oh, thank you. Well, I mean, I agree. I think there's so few of us, and I think that you and I are oftentimes on the same wavelength too, which I really appreciate that we have. Every time you put something out there, I'm like, yes, that is exactly me too. Like, exactly what I would say. That's exactly what I would advise. That's exactly what I do. So it's good to know that there are other mamas out there like me. But I just always appreciate your messages, too.

Liza (Host) 00:03:34
Yeah, likewise. I love when I see you come across my feed.

CC (Guest) 00:03:38
Always same.

Liza (Host) 00:03:41
I don't even know your whole story. I mean, I know that we've lived through so many similar things, the mold, the pans and everything, the journey. But I can't wait to hear your story. So share a little bit more about, like, what happened.

CC (Guest) 00:03:58
Well, it's funny, I had a call yesterday because I'm starting down this path with another child in which I think you know how common that is as well. But where does the story start? Even that's part of the challenge of this journey is, like, where did this actually start? The worst of it definitely started two years ago. And I know the day, I know exactly when things changed. But then when you start doing all the research and you start looking back and. I mean. There was a point in time where I printed out I have three children. I printed out all three medical records. And I started combing through all three of their records. Trying to tie together. Like. Because my child that was most affected had her tonsils and adenoids taken out when she was two and a half. And so when I just knew the basics about Pandas and didn't really even know what pans was, you know, I'd heard of Pandas, and in fact, in 2019, we had our girls evaluated. We did the whole full psychosocial evaluation done on both girls. And in that evaluation, the psychologist who was a man so sharp and so keen, one of the first things she asked me about my daughter was, has she ever had a lot of stress? And my answer was, no, she had her toxins taken out. So end of story, right? Because she was the first one, and I had heard of Pandas, and as soon as she said Strep, I was like, oh, she's thinking it's pandas. And me not knowing very much. And her not knowing very much. I brushed it aside, I said, no, she's never really had strep because she had her tonsils taken out. And so, again, I'm like where this started, I have absolutely no idea. But the fall of 2020 is really where it hits. And I wouldn't say that there was, like, this drastic change overnight. I mean, looking back, you know, a lot of people say their child went to school and they came home a different child, or they woke up the next day and their child was just different. Looking back, I mean, I see the differences now, but when you're living in it and we already have such a chaotic family existence, just with three kids, a lot of neurodivergence, a lot of by the fall of 2020, I don't even know how many diagnoses we had been handed down for all three kids.

Liza (Host) 00:06:43
Yes, and I can relate to this. And I think a lot of listeners can, where you just you're moving around in this journey, and the next thing you know, it's one diagnosis. It's two diagnosis, and time passes, and you don't realize we are a special needs family. You don't realize it until you are sitting there filling out paperwork for one of your children, and you're like, well, these are the medications we're on. These are the supplements we're on. These are the diagnosis you have. And you look at it and you're.

CC (Guest) 00:07:13
Like, wow, no wonder I'm so tired.

Liza (Host) 00:07:19
It's like the slow drip, and you just keep extending your bandwidth, and you don't utilize it.

CC (Guest) 00:07:27
Yeah, I mean, it was a slow drip over many, many years. And looking back again, like, did this start in 2020 or did this start in 2013? And I think if we were to talk to other mothers in this situation, I mean, I think it goes back, and then you have such a different perspective once you get in this world and you know all of the different pieces and things that could play into a pans diagnosis that you're like, oh, wait. By the fall of 2020, we had, like, so many diagnoses, autism, ADHD, asthma, learning disabilities, dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, adjustment disorder, I'm probably leading sensory OCD, OCD, anxiety. All these things were thrown at us. And I was like, oh, wow. Okay. And in a way, it did explain things, because it was like, oh, okay, that's why these traditional things aren't working. That's why. But then it really hit November 2020, and what happened?

Liza (Host) 00:08:39
Was there a particular incident?

CC (Guest) 00:08:42
Yeah, so my daughter was sick, and it wasn't anything that appeared to be horrible. It was very mild, in fact. And a week before that daughter got sick, my other daughter came home, and she used to be really good about getting off the bus or coming home and being like, Mommy, I have Strep. We need to go in. Like, I need antibiotics. I have strep. And she was never wrong. Well, November 2020, she came home one day. She said, Mommy, I have strep. And I was like, all right, let's take you in. She got swabbed. It was negative. They tested her for coba. That was also negative. And then the week after that, my other daughter got sick. They tested her for everything. Everything was negative. But it became apparent that something was happening, right? So again, that illness, it wasn't bad, but she stayed in bed that whole week, and then things just started to shift. And when I look back and think about it, it was like a snowball rolling down a hill very fast. So it wasn't like this overnight thing, but it was just it went from missing a week of school to all of a sudden having so many sensory issues, so many sleep issues, attachment issues. She didn't want to go to school. She started refusing school. She started describing school as chaotic, overwhelming, too stressful, she couldn't sit in the classroom. The classroom was just too much for her. And this was my child who was always the one who did great in school. Like, she was not the child that couldn't sit still. She was the child that could focus. She was the child that loved homework. She was the child that loved projects and teachers, and, like, she thrived in school, and all of a sudden, that was the first thing. And then our nights became unbearable. Try not to cry. Yeah, our nights became unbearable, and it was like she was possessed. And so I make this emergency appointment with a psychiatrist and not to knock doctors and not to knock any certain person or any certain medical provider, but it's that lack of awareness that leads us down so many rabbit holes. And so they immediately put her on an SSRI. The side effects were horrible. It made her worse, actually. I immediately found a therapist to treat her. Luckily, the therapist I'm forever grateful for this therapist, because she tried and tried and tried, and she was an expert in all of the diagnosis that we were dealing with up to that point. And she kept saying, this is just not working. This is just not working. And I was literally begging her. I was like, I don't know what else to do. I don't know where to take her. I don't know what to do. Please just help us. Please just see this out.

Liza (Host) 00:11:44
I can so relate, because when you start going to the psychiatrist, nobody wants to put their child on medication. I've had to do it. These are really hard decisions. And then you have the therapist, and, like, things are not clicking. Traditional things are not clicking. There's no awareness. And I shouldn't say no awareness. There is a lack of awareness, right. A lack of awareness on the front line with the schools and the therapists and the world of psychiatry. And so then we I don't know if this happened to you. I start feeling like, what the hell am I doing wrong? What the hell is with our family? It's us, right?

CC (Guest) 00:12:27
Yeah.

Liza (Host) 00:12:28
It's like a little phase that I feel like it's very natural to go through, because you're like, then it's just us.

CC (Guest) 00:12:35
Oh, yeah. And then part of the thing is, you go to the school and the school, and again, I'm so traumatized. And I don't use that word lightly. I know sometimes in social, I like, I'm so traumatized. No, no, no. I'm really traumatized by what happened in the school setting and what happened with all the doctors we saw and all that. It is real trauma. But the school, they're like, oh, she's fine at school. We did meet with the school. They did try to help us. But I think at this point, like, I think if there's a child that just all of a sudden starts refusing, I mean, okay, let's look at bullying. Let's look at anxiety. Let's look at Pants and Pandas as well.

Liza (Host) 00:13:25
Amen.

CC (Guest) 00:13:27
Let's throw in that, because sometimes it's that, and that's like, one of the biggest things that tie these kids together is that school avoidance, school refusal, whatever you call it, but schools don't know anything about it right now.

Liza (Host) 00:13:44
I think this is so important. I'm so glad that you put that out there, because this could be a medical condition, right? And I think that awareness is so key. Okay, so you're going through this really hard time. Your daughter is undiagnosed. How did she finally get a diagnosis? Tell us a little bit more about that.

CC (Guest) 00:14:08
I'll try to give you the Cliffs Notes version, because, let's see, we're talking January 2021, and she wasn't diagnosed until early December 2021. January of 2022. Really? We went through, I think it was 13 doctors, therapists, psychiatrists, medical providers, because we just couldn't find answers. And like I said before, I think we started recording. I was flipping over every single stone as a mother. Like, I was up in the middle of the night researching. I was trying to find I was in special needs groups. I was searching and researching and trying to figure it out. And Pants and Pandas was the last, absolute last stone that I overturned, really. And it ended up being a boulder, but I'm so glad I did. But what happened was we were going to the therapist, but I was, like, begging, please don't dismiss us. Please, please, please keep trying to work with her. Please, please. When she finally said, listen, I think something neurological is going on, I don't know what. She didn't mention Panzer Pandas, but she said, I want to refer you to another therapist in town who deals with more of, like, the neurological stuff. And I said, okay. And it was someone I knew that we had actually seen in our past trying to help figure out the answers. Yeah, and she recommended that we do a Q EEG, which is a brain mapping scan. And so we did that, and it actually showed inflammation in her brain. But it doesn't tell you why. Like, it just says, there's a reason why this is happening. Like, the back part isn't talking to the front part. And so that kind of gradually led us onto this path. And then what happened was one day we had a really, really, really bad week, and I was trying to get my daughter seen by as many professionals as possible. We were still trying to do therapy. We were doing occupational therapy, and we had a very bad visit with the OT. And the OT pulled me aside, and she said, if you bring her back like this again, I'm going to have to call 911. What? Yeah, and it was horrible. I was crying. My daughter was crying. The OT was crying. It was horrible. So that day, I knew I was like, okay, things are bad. Like, sometimes you get in that survival mode that you don't even realize just how bad it is. Yes.

Liza (Host) 00:16:53
Because you are in the zone, down in the trenches, and until you can kind of take a look at the situation from a couple levels up, you really don't even know how bad and dire it is. You're just in survival mode.

CC (Guest) 00:17:10
Yes, in total survival mode. In total, like, fix it mode, too, because I was, like, calling people for help. I was looking for answers. I was in all the mom groups, and so that was really my wake up call. And so that day, I went home and I posted in a local special needs group for help. And I just said, we're at a breaking point. What hospital do I take her to? What residential treatment facilities? I was looking for, like, crisis intervention for mental health specifically. Right. And thank God another mother had seen my posts over, because this was not my first post in this group. From November. This is in March. So from November to March, I had been posting in this special needs group for psychiatrists, therapists. I was just asking for anything and everything. And this other mother commented, and she said, have you looked at pans and pandas? I've been watching you post for several months, and your story reminds me so much of what we went through with my son. I'm begging you to look at pants and pandas. Don't send your child to a residential treatment facility. Don't take your child to the emergency room. And I reached out to her, and her name is Angela, and I will never forget her. She's goosebumps.

Liza (Host) 00:18:39
She's a little angel.

CC (Guest) 00:18:41
Really? Really. And luckily, I had a friend who I knew had a daughter with Pandas. And so I reached out and I said, Jess, this is bad. What do I do? And she said, okay. And she sprung into action, and she actually sent me a treatment plan, which I guess we should put, like, a medical disclaimer in here that we are. Moms, I do not have a medical degree. My friend did not have a medical degree. But we were so desperate, and she just the first mother who posted, you know, have you ever considered pans and pandas? That got the ball rolling. I reached out to my friend Jess and she said, all right, do these things. I went out, I got die free medicine.

Liza (Host) 00:19:22
I was like, I know what those things are. Let me guess. Antihistamine.

CC (Guest) 00:19:29
Typhree Claritin. Yup. Lemon balm. I'm trying to remember, like, she sent me, like, all these things together.

Liza (Host) 00:19:35
Probably some melatonin. Throw in some melatonin at night.

CC (Guest) 00:19:39
We had been doing melatonin for years, but the main things were motorin, antihistamine and the lemon balm. The lemon balm really was huge. And so we started our daughter. That was a Friday. I remember I went out and I was like, I bought it all started it, and the nightmare at night kind of ended. I've never talked really openly about what was going on, because I want to protect her, you know?

Liza (Host) 00:20:14
I do. I very much understand.

CC (Guest) 00:20:17
But she was screaming every single night, screaming. I gave her the motion. She didn't scream that night.

Liza (Host) 00:20:28
You know, I do. It's so much influence. Their brains are on fire. There is a book called Brain on Fire.

CC (Guest) 00:20:35
Absolutely.

Liza (Host) 00:20:37
And what you're describing, that happened in my home, too. The screening sounded like somebody was giving birth screaming.

CC (Guest) 00:20:46
That is the PTSD.

Liza (Host) 00:20:48
That is that people outside of the home don't understand. That's the trauma. And you do nothing you can do.

CC (Guest) 00:20:58
Yeah, it was horrible. And there was no denying I have a sip of water now. Yeah, there was no denying. I think by that point, when we started the motorant, we had tried, let's see, prozac, Zoloft, lamktal. I can't remember what else, but we had tried and die metron and die free claritin. And by the third morning, I woke up and I heard at this point, I had removed her from school. I was home schooling her. So nights were horrible, so I didn't wake her up in the morning. She would wake up when she would wake up. And I remember that morning, I was upstairs, and I heard this sweet little voice, and I was like, what is that? She was in her bed. She was just woken up, and she was singing to herself, and she was making up the sweet little song about our dog, and I just lost it.

Liza (Host) 00:22:08
I'm like losing it now, too. Yes. That's when you know they are starting to come back to you, right? And their daughter does the same thing. They are in there. And whenever I hear my daughter saying, I get the goosebumps all over again. It's just a place of you just know there's that moment that you're savoring that my child is okay in this moment right now.

CC (Guest) 00:22:35
Right. And I haven't lost her. Because you just don't know. You just don't know when they're going to come back. You don't know what's going on. It is so terrifying and scary. You feel so unbelievably, helpless. Helpless doesn't even cut it.

Liza (Host) 00:22:53
There's not a word for it.

CC (Guest) 00:22:54
There's not a word for it, what you feel as a mom. And I think, you know, I think we all in this world, we become such resilient fighters and researchers. And I told one of my friends recently, I said, I have our job title. And she was like, what? And I said, we are professional onion peelers. We are professional onion peelers. We just peel back the one layer, and then there's another layer and another layer, another layer like that's. What I've become is just this professional onion peeler. But we knew we were onto something, that we had given her all these SSRIs, and there was talk of starting her on antipsychotic, and like nothing was working, nothing was bringing relief. And for a few days of motrin and antihistamines, like, I knew we were onto something. So that's when we went down that path and I mean, the path was not straightforward. No, it never very bumpy. The doctor that did end up diagnosing her was the third pandas expert that we saw. We actually drove over 2000 miles across country to see experts who told us that it was just anxiety that we.

Liza (Host) 00:24:16
Were dealing with even this specialized niche. That's heartbreaking.

CC (Guest) 00:24:21
Yeah. Well, what I will tell you is that I don't want to bad mouth them. I'm not going to mention who it wasn't, where it was. But I will tell you that unfortunately, what I've now learned is that some of the pans pandas researchers who are headquartered in major universities I'm trying to think of a nice I understand what you're saying.

Liza (Host) 00:24:44
Well, here's what I see happening. It's kind of a buzzword. And there are some people that are going to maybe jump on that train, but they really don't have the experience of healing children. They may have seen some of these kids present and maybe they offered some treatments for even more acute situations. But when you have a child, like your child and my children, where it's.

CC (Guest) 00:25:17
Like the slow drip snowball exactly.

Liza (Host) 00:25:20
More complex. And then you really need to go to someone who's been doing this for years yes.

CC (Guest) 00:25:27
And understand all the components. Because like I said, professional onion peeler. We started realizing, oh, we're dealing with, yes, anxiety, and, yes, autism, and yes, pans. But we were also dealing with mold, we were dealing with mitochondrial dysfunction and like ourselves, yeah, we're still peeling back those layers, you know. And so where we went, it was a very traditional view of pandas sudden onset due to strep and we didn't fit their checklist.

Liza (Host) 00:26:10
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you, but I wanted to mention something too, because you spoke so well about this. We are professional onion peelers. That's what we do. But I also want to add to that through the journey, we have completely sharpened the discernment ability of like, I'll hear somebody talk who is in the field and I'll think to myself, well, that's garbage. And move on quickly because we don't have time anymore. It's like you just get better at that ability too, of being able to discern what is going to work for your kid.

CC (Guest) 00:26:49
Right. I like to try to piece out like, what can be learned from this, how can I help somebody else? I don't really live with regrets, but if there's something I could have done differently, I would have trusted my gut. I almost canceled that appointment to drive across country and I didn't because we fought hard to get that appointment and I had to apply and I had to send them all this paperwork. And so we met the initial requirements or whatever to even meet with them. But then when we got there, it kind of all fell apart. But my gut, about a week beforehand, I was like, I think we need to go to a different kind of doctor. And I didn't trust that. And I went through with the appointment. And then also, I think hindsight is 2020, but I just wish that I had really gone with a different kind of expert. The person we went to was really all we could get. Like, you know, she was local. She said, I can treat it, but I do it really slowly. And she just wasn't well versed in everything. And so I just wish I had taken the time to really dig. But again, I didn't know all the onion peels at that time, so I just kind of thought, oh, something's going on. Don't really know what. But we ended up with the most amazing doctors. And then, like I said, very long story short, we did get a diagnosis of autoimmune encephalitis. I think that was official, like, in January or February of this year. And it was just such a relief to finally have someone recognize what we were going through and see. And what I did was I made a video of before and after pictures, and I did a video of a day in our life, just 24 hours. It was a seven minute video, but I took video clips of what our life was like throughout the day, and I sent it to our doctors who knew at that time, they knew exactly what we were dealing with. But then that's when the diagnosis became official, and they recommended IVIG. It was the video. I showed pictures of what my child looked like before all this happened and after. And you cannot deny undeniably. You just can't deny that there's something medical. It is not like just anxiety or just autism or even just OCD. I mean, it was something systemic, something inside her body and brain and gut. It was just so obvious at that.

Liza (Host) 00:29:37
Point, wow, that is great advice for someone. But I mean, that's great that you did that, and that is great advice for the people that are in the fog still or are undiagnosed, because a lot of times you bring your child to these appointments or you even do them online and the child is just sitting there, they're not seeing the real situation. So I think that is such amazing advice, CC. Thank you for sharing that.

CC (Guest) 00:30:11
It's great advice. But the thing I will tell you is I had been trying to get doctors to watch one of our videos for years. I've been trying since 2018 someone just to look at a video. And I remember the first psychiatrist we went to, I was telling her what was going on at home, and I said, well, we have videos. We take videos every now and then because, I mean, we were scared of Child Protective Services. We were scared of having 911 called on us. We were trying to protect our families sometimes when we took videos, but also hoping that somebody at some point would look at the video and be like, oh, this is what you're dealing with. But I remember that psychiatrist was like, I don't need to see it, I know what's going on. And F is just like, wow. So anyway. I mean. As great as it is that I made that seven minute video with before and after pictures and videos and everything. We need more medical providers who will take the time to truly get to know these cases and look at all the information and come through all the evaluations and lab results and everything and really get to know the child instead of just making this snap judgment that becomes detrimental. Like, a child with the diagnosis of bipolar or odd or whatever gets treated so much differently than a child with autoimmune Encephalitis or basal ganglia Encephalitis or Lyme disease or whatever. It's very different. And so I wish there were more medical providers like the ones we found who take that time to really sit down and get to know the child and get to know the medical history. And then they made that diagnosis based on looking at years and years of information and data and everything about my child. So we were lucky to find them.

Liza (Host) 00:32:21
That is a testament to all the things that you do. Somehow you did manage to get to this, like, empowered place, right? How does that happen? Let's unpack some of this. Because now you show up on social media, you really help other mothers prioritize their needs, see through the fog. So there must have been a shift that happened to you.

CC (Guest) 00:32:57
Well, what did you call it before?

Liza (Host) 00:32:59
Divine divine detour we were talking offline and yes, these are these divine detours. So let's talk a little bit more about this.

CC (Guest) 00:33:08
So it truly was fate. It was just a divine thing. I actually have been coaching women for seven and a half years and totally fell into that myself. And just before all of this hit with my child, I also fell into getting certified to become a Mindset coach, which was not anything I set out to do. Like, I was really happy kind of focusing. When I first started my coaching business, it was purely on fitness and nutrition, fitness and nutrition, just the basics. And as my personal process and my personal selfcare grew, it expanded into way more than just like exercising and eating vegetables. And then the Mindset piece was just huge for me. Now I was a psychology major, I always thought I'd become like a marriage and family therapist. I was a social worker for a while. I worked with abuse and neglected children. So it's not totally outside my wheelhouse, but I really fell into it. I signed up to do a. Money Mindset course, which again, was not anything I felt like I needed. It just kind of appealed to me. I felt like, you know, like you hear when you're a coach, you hear, well, coaches need coaches, and, like, you got to sign up for these personal development things. And so I just kind of went along with the flow and ended up getting certified after that Money Mindset course. I then signed up with the woman who became my coach to get certified in Mindset coaching. And I did a real recently about this, and it's so incredibly true. I don't have any Mindset Coaching clients right now because you're looking at my number one client. In order to get through this nightmare that we've been living for two years, I've been coaching myself. Like, all of the tools that I learned to help others with things. Like, I use this every day. And so I'm finally at the point where I feel like, okay, I've got to share what has helped me. I've got to share what I've been doing, because that's why we're okay. That's why we've made it out of this still with the potential to thrive as a family. That's why I've been okay as a mom. Like, man, there have been some dark days, and you know what I mean, you know how dark it gets and how isolating and how oh, you just don't see how you're going to get out of it. You don't see how you're going to get your choice.

Liza (Host) 00:35:44
You don't have a path out.

CC (Guest) 00:35:46
You really don't. And I made that path out for us, it was conscious. It was choice after choice. It was practice after practice. It was a lot of hard work, and I'm so very grateful, like I said, for our doctors. But if I'm being honest and I'm not tooting my own horn at all, it was me and my selfcare practices and my Mindset practices and my focus on getting through things and just everything that I learned through Mindset coaching that got us to the point where we are today of healing. I manifested the healing.

Liza (Host) 00:36:26
Yes. I want to talk more about that because I know people are going to be hearing this, and they're going to be like, well, what did she do? So, A, maybe you can share, like, your top three or top five or whatever you're like, you know, your biggest things that you could tell someone in the darkest days. But I do want to say I remember one of the best pieces, pieces of advice that I ever got from someone was, a doctor's not going to heal you. A therapist isn't going to heal you. Ultimately, you have to heal yourself. With our children, it's kind of there's an extension there of like, if you're just trying to find, like, this one pill or this one doctor that's going to change everything for you, that's not reality. The change starts with us that's really where what I love to share with my clients because that's what I had to do for myself. But I know there are people listening to this and they're like, well, what did CC do? I mean, can you share just like what is your biggest or your top three or what are the things that you really want moms to know that are in this journey?

CC (Guest) 00:37:39
Amen to everything that you just said, first of all, because I think I spent the first, you know, year of this journey seeking out doctors, seeking out like, people with answers and who could write prescriptions or do whatever. And when I shifted back to myself, which I didn't neglect myself any of that time, I mean, I was still meditating every day. I was still doing my morning process, I still was sticking to all of that. But when I really got intentional with what I was doing and it started in May, the shift happened in May of this year. And coincidentally, that's when we started IBIG. That is when my daughter started healing. My thoughts shifted and, you know, it's a lot woo woo. But I think pants and pandas mamas, I think we will try anything to heal our children, so why not get a little bit woo woo? I mean, like, I think back to all the things we tried to heal our daughter medically. I ordered organic freeze dried donkey milk from the Azores to try to heal her. You know what I mean? I tried every medication. We tried diet changes, we tried lemon balm, tea, like, you name it. Like if you can try that, how about let's try a little bit of this woo woo of keeping where you are and your vibration and your energy shift it back to one of healing. And so it's going to sound crazy. It is so much simpler than people I think, give credit to. Like it's not that complicated, but it's the consistency and it is the follow through of moving through the negative as quickly as possible. And I'm not talking about like toxic. Positivity has given positivity a bad name. I'm not talking about, oh, yes, I've been happy every day, but I have shifted my energy every single day as quickly as I can from, for lack of a better word, the negative, to a more open place for healing. You can't heal when all your thinking is of all the fears and worries. And I have some things that I repeat very often and it's just these little phrases affirmations that get me shifted back to the state deposit. I choose to see love. The end of that is I choose to see love instead of fear. But I don't even say the word fear anymore. I just say I choose to see love. I think the universe quite often for this spiritual assignment. And I was telling a friend the other day, I was like, sometimes I'm like, thank you for the spiritual assignment. And I'm like, another freaking spiritual assignment. Thank you for the lesson.

Liza (Host) 00:40:42
I am so grateful.

CC (Guest) 00:40:44
But you develop this kind of 6th sense of humor where it's like, okay, this is just another spiritual assignment. This layer of the onion is just another spiritual assignment. And so some of the really practical things that help me a lot is I mean, I meditate every day, sometimes multiple times a day. And the thing about meditation is, I mean, I am a recovering perfectionist. And so for me, sitting down to meditate, I thought it had to look a certain way. I mean, it doesn't. Like the only bad meditation is the one that didn't happen. Our children have a disease of the nervous system. They seek us out to help themselves stay regulated. It is my number one job every day to regulate myself and come from a place of peace and calm. I mean, do I get upset? Do I get mad? Do I cry? Do I yell? Hell yes. But I come back to that place of, okay, like, we can deal with this. We just take it one day at a time, one moment at a time. Tapping EFT tapping. That works extraordinarily well for me to shift my energy from negative to the positive and just the phrase of I am willing to believe. People are always surprised to hear that I, for the majority of my life, was a very negative, cynical, realistic person. The CCUC I created through really the catalyst was getting certified as a mindset coach. I'm very negative at heart. I was always well with me, why is this happening to me? I have such bad luck. Like, I grew up saying that for years and years, and it wasn't until my 40s that I began to realize that I had control over that and that I could choose how I saw things and that I could look for the really small microscopic winds and I could shift my thinking and shift my energy. And actually, as a control freak, it's actually pretty cool. Like, I like to have things to control and what better thing to control than how I'm regulated, how I'm viewing the world, my outlook, my mindset? I just shifted that control to those things that I can shift and that do make a meaningful difference. But for me, it has just been all about the consistent practices and it doesn't take long. Like, every morning I wake up, I meditate, and then I do my gratitude and I do my intention or affirmations for the day and they're simple. It's like be present. The one that really opened me up in May was I kept saying that I believed in miracles, but then at the end of May, I added in, I believe in miracles and I'm ready to receive. Wow.

Liza (Host) 00:43:48
Because what you put out there, you do receive. Yeah, I love that. Everything you're talking about, I had to incorporate these things. And I always tell the people that I coach that you have said this perfectly. Our children are coming to us because they are in crisis. They need to feel safe. If you don't become that rock of stability, the whole ship starts to sink. And that is your one job, just as you had mentioned, your one job is to be an anchor and keep this ship from getting crazy. And the ability to feel safe is priceless. And that is the work.

CC (Guest) 00:44:36
It is the work. It is the work. And when I just devoted myself to doing that work every day and using the tools that I need. When things pop up. Like. I know what tools I can go to. But it's just that consistency and the belief that we can heal. There's just so much doubt. Negativity. And fear. And it exists rightly so in this world for a reason. In this pants pandas world for a reason. Because it's crazy. It's so unpredictable. What worked for my child might not work for your child, and it's so hard. But just sticking with the belief that healing as possible and trying to just move through things as quickly as possible, it's just served me so, so well, as hokey as it is sometimes. But I'm like, you know what? It works for me. It absolutely works for me. And I am living proof. Like, I can pinpoint like and this is the thing that I used to think about before we got into this. I could manifest things for my business, for my personal life. Like, they were goals that I I've was always been a big goal setter. And I was like, all right, I know how to hit goals. I know how to make things happen financially or with my business or whatever. But I did stumble for a while trying to figure out, like, how do I do this for my child? Can I do this for my child? Can you do it when there's, like, this big medical thing involved? And yes, you can. Yes, you absolutely can. And I think the sooner you learn to do that, the better your path will be for your family and for your child. I just really believe that. I think back to the fear I had when we were going through mold remediation and holy cow, that's a whole nother pocket. It is.

Liza (Host) 00:46:43
We have to shove that for part two CC. You come back and we will have that remediation crazy story.

CC (Guest) 00:46:50
But I think that even when my view of that shifted, yes, everything shifted for us. I don't live in the fear of, oh, my God, did we get all the mold out? I'm like, no, I live in this house. I feel that it's different. I know that it's different. I believe that it's different. I know that healing is possible here. And I made that choice. I made that choice. We did all the things, and you just have to keep coming back to things that you're willing to believe. And that's from the EFT tapping. That's like the middle. You start off with the negative when you're tapping, and then you get into what you're willing to believe. And that's where the shift always happens for me. I'm willing to believe that my child can heal. And the next step is my child heals, you know, but you have to start somewhere. And going from the negative to the positive sometimes is a big leap. So that willing to believe well, and.

Liza (Host) 00:47:54
I speak a lot to neutrality. I speak a lot to like, look, there is this whole spectrum in between. You don't have to be positive, but you don't have to sit in the negative. And there's just this place of like, this is just a neutral experience. And there's great power there too. But I wanted to ask you about two things. A, how is your daughter doing today?

CC (Guest) 00:48:20
She is great. We have seen I'm going to start crying again. We've seen so many miracles. And the one thing I also have learned about healing is that healing is exhausting. Healing takes a lot of time and energy. I kind of had in my head this vision of healing that, okay, she would heal, life would go back to normal. And like, I would have all this time and energy for myself. And that is really not what happens. It is lovely and beautiful, and it is such a miracle. It is exhausting. And the thing that I have to remind myself is I give myself a lot of grace. I give myself a lot of reminders to rest and take care of myself too, that we're all healing. But healing is not linear. It is the craziest. Up and down, back and forth, sideways roller coaster.

Liza (Host) 00:49:19
It's organic like that.

CC (Guest) 00:49:22
It is. And we were at Disney last week, which was just an unbelievable miracle that we were able to go to Disney, considering where we were three months ago even. But my husband, I think I can't remember what, I was upset over at Disney, but something was happening. I was just like, oh my God, I can't handle this. And he said, CC, no matter what, we're going to look back at this trip and we're going to see the miracles. We're going to know that this was such a huge step for our family. And he said that, and I was like, you're right. It's such a miracle. So she still has a lot of healing left to do. And that's one thing that I know. Probably you have followers who are in our world, but I hope you have followers who aren't in our world. I actually have people who are in.

Liza (Host) 00:50:15
Our world, and I speak outside of our world too, because it's very important.

CC (Guest) 00:50:20
To do that right, because I think the one thing is I'll get a message from a friend, and they think everything is hunky dory now. I'm like oh, no. Healing is very messy. Like, yes, my child is not trapped in her room anymore. You know, she's willing to get dressed and leave the house. OCD does not rule her life anymore. But we still have a long way to go.

Liza (Host) 00:50:46
It's kind of like, now you're in a place this is where I've been for the last year, maybe I don't even know, because the whole timeline is, you know, there is no timeline. But now you're in a place where you can work on all of those other issues, like the sensory processing and the adapt and the Dyslexia, like, now you're there. As if those things weren't hard enough, though. Do you know what I mean?

CC (Guest) 00:51:14
Right.

Liza (Host) 00:51:15
But you are in a more empowered place, so I do very much understand that. But I need you to also share before we go, because I know you and I could go on all day. There's so much CC that you bring to the world, not just through social media or your mindset stuff, but you're launching a blog now. You have businesses tell everybody, what can we expect to see from you? How can we find you? Where's the best place to interact with you? All that good stuff.

CC (Guest) 00:51:48
Yeah, well, my main places on Instagram at Soul Shine Mom. I have had Soul Shine Mom for ever and a day. And when I became a special needs mom and other mom told me I was having a particularly hard day, I was reaching out to her. I was, like, just going through, like I don't even remember what was happening at the time. This was before Pans and Pandas came into the picture, but she was just giving me some words of advice, and the very last thing she said was, you know, don't ever forget you were made to be her mama. And I was like, oh, okay.

Liza (Host) 00:52:22
Yeah.

CC (Guest) 00:52:23
And that kind of became my mantra that just really spoke to my heart that like, oh, yeah, that's right. She picked me for a reason. My children picked me. And when things get really hard, I just tell myself, no, I was made to be their mom, and nobody knows them better than I do. No doctor, no therapist, no psychiatrist, no teacher. It's me. And I get to have that privilege. And so every day, I just try to live up to the best of my ability just to be the mom that they need. Is it the mom I thought they needed? Absolutely not. Do we have the life? It doesn't look like anything I thought it would look like, but it's so much more rewarding and so much more beautiful. But I had the idea earlier in the year to write a book. I've always wanted to write a book. And made to be their mom kind of spoke to me. And since Affirmations have been, like, so huge for me. And I get stuck on thoughts. And so for me, I need to get stuck on a positive thought. I need to get stuck on an empowering thought or a safe thought or a grateful thought or something. And so the working title of the book is Made to be Their Mom Affirmation, daily affirmations for hope and Resilience. And I don't know if this is me procrastinating the writing of the book, but in the meantime, I decided to start a blog because I thought, okay, I really wanted to reach as many women and moms as possible. And so how can I do that? And, you know, on Instagram, it's a little clunky to share. Like I share it's. Like, what I'm going to be sharing on the blog isn't new information. It's stuff that I share every day on Instagram. But it's so much easier to have a blog and send someone a link and say, oh, I just talked about this, or I go to my blog and search pans or, you know, have like, keyword searches and stuff. And so I just decided that I want to start growing my audience even more and my email list even more so that when I do have a finished book to show to a publisher, I can say, I have this community already, I have these followers, I have these people I'm helping and kind of go from there. But admittedly, my businesses have taken a huge hit from this pans and Pandas situation, and I'm still trying to recreate myself. Like, what I built, I lost a little bit of. But I'm excited about what it's going to look like in the future. And my husband and I both feel very much a calling and a purpose to help other families and to bring these inflammatory disorders to light and to talk about mold and environmental toxins and just everything, because there's so much more to it. And we're not experts. We're just experts in the life that we've lived for however many years. And, you know, I just hope that in sharing, like, what we've been through and the tools that have helped me, that we can help others. So that's what I'm trying to do with the blog, is take the tools that I've used, these affirmations or meditations or whatever, and combine them with the stories that they helped me get through.

Liza (Host) 00:55:49
I love it. I love it. I think you are so empowered. We've been connected for some time now, but it's today. Like, the person you are today is the most empowered version I've ever seen. Thank you.

CC (Guest) 00:56:04
You're the only guy.

Liza (Host) 00:56:06
But, I mean, that's the journey. That's what it does. You don't go back to your old life. You're on to this new life. And I can't wait to see your book and your blog.

CC (Guest) 00:56:15
Thank you so much. Well, again, not to hammer this in too much, but I made the choice to let this empower me instead of letting it zap my power or break me. And not to say that some days I did feel very broken and very powerless, but I always made the choice to find, like, what can I take away from this? How can this empower me? How can I take this and build a new version of myself and a new version of my family? So, again, I know people hate hearing that. And the old me used to roll her eyes up and like, oh, it's a choice. Yeah, I know it's a choice. Whatever. But there's truth to it. Yeah.

Liza (Host) 00:57:00
You are living, breathing truth of that.

CC (Guest) 00:57:02
Yeah. And I tell my daughter that, too. She's missed out on a lot of her childhood. A lot, a lot. And I keep telling her, it's going to be your choice to let this make you into the most empowered, successful version of yourself. You can choose to use this experience to be a better person, be a better artist, be a better teacher. Whatever it is she chooses to be in her life, it's going to make her into who she is. And I have to live that, too. I have to be the first role model of that for her.

Liza (Host) 00:57:41
Right, you better do that. Exactly.

CC (Guest) 00:57:43
Yeah. And I doubt myself every day, but I have to flip it. I have to flip it. I have to flip it.

Liza (Host) 00:57:49
It's a practice.

CC (Guest) 00:57:50
It is a practice. It is a practice.

Liza (Host) 00:57:54
CC, thank you so much.

CC (Guest) 00:57:56
You are so welcome. This has been so fun. I should have warned you that I could talk all day about all of these subjects and there's so many different paths we could have headed down. Well, it's going to have to have.

Liza (Host) 00:58:06
You back on the podcast.

CC (Guest) 00:58:07
Yeah, I would love it. All right.

Liza (Host) 00:58:10
Thank you so much, my friend.

CC (Guest) 00:58:12
You're so welcome.

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