How to Survive the Redshirt Year: A Mental Playbook with Morgan Kane-Brons

Matt Cundill  00:01

This is the mental approach where we discuss mindfulness, mental performance and the tools available for coping in a high performance world. Here's Todd Arkell today.

Todd Arkell  00:12

My guest is Morgan Kane bronze, a former division one basketball athlete and a mindset and mental performance coach. She played at Iowa State University, where she won a big 12 championship and made a sweet 16 appearance. Pretty cool, actually, after completing her bachelor's degree in Exercise Science, Morgan used her final year of eligibility to continue competing at a division two level in Florida, once again, reaching the sweet 16 while earning her master's degree in sports science. Welcome to the show. That's a lot. I love it. Thank you.

Speaker 1  00:46

Lots of success. Grateful, grateful for the opportunities I was put in to have that success.

Todd Arkell  00:53

Yeah, there you go. So were you four years or five years at Iowa? Just four, right? And then I was five, okay? And then your grad year for Okay,

Speaker 1  01:01

yeah, I redshirted my freshman year at Iowa State, so I stayed there five and then took one year grad down in southern Florida.

Todd Arkell  01:09

That's awesome. That's awesome. So there you go. Well, we'll talk about that later, because I think for college athletes, that what is the mental state of a red shirt red shirt athlete. So that's kind of interesting. But before we get into the mindset, stuff like, take us back a bit, what was your own path into coaching and mental performance? Like, how did that sort of happen for you?

Speaker 1  01:33

In my high school years, I didn't really know much about mindset. It was more like I had a strength and conditioning coach, and it was like, lift heavy, get fast, you know, all the physical performance of it. And then I got a scholarship at Iowa State, and I went to Iowa State as a freshman, and I just started learning about the mental side of it. It was like a freshman athlete orientation, and we had a sports psychologist come to talk to us of like, Hey, I'm here if you need me, if you're, like, dealing with pressure, or, like, how to handle things, if you need, like, Help with what you say in your head self talk, I'm your I'm your guy. And when he said that, I just kind of like, brush it off. Like, okay, I'll keep the business card just in case. But like, I'm an athlete, I'm at the college level, I'm at a division one school, like, I'm good. I don't need any help. I made it and and then I just started practices, and I was like, I need help. My mindset. Just struggled in college, just kind of jumping into a very high level team, and as a young freshman that still had a lot to learn. And that's where my, kind of, my introduction into the mindset started. And then from there, five years at Iowa State, I was able to learn and grow from my own personal experiences. And then I was able to work at some private sector strength and conditioning facilities and start to implement that mindset and see what it looks like, not only from my own experience, but now. What does it look like to coach mindset and like, you know, being an athlete and a coach like they're very separate things, and so learning the difference between those two as well? Yeah, no, no.

Todd Arkell  03:26

100% I think let's talk about that. Then a lot of kids, you know, they think they're gonna go to college and they're a freshman in whatever their given sport is, and they're gonna play maybe depending on the level and everything else. And even though you're a red shirt, you're not playing, but you're doing all of the work, all of the practicing, all of the lifting, all of the school work and everything else. How is that adjustment for you? Like, like, going, like, Well, I came here to play, and now I've got to do everything, but I don't get the payoff. I had a hard

Speaker 1  04:01

time coming to terms when the coaches had kind of started that conversation with me, of like, hey, we think you should red shirt because I had been practicing with the team for a couple months in the off season. I got there in June. So for women's basketball athletes, you have all summer to kind of get to know your team, start to learn the plays. It's definitely less hours. Just kind of, like, get acclimated. You're with the strength coach a lot, which, which helped me. I love being in the weight room. I just that's where I thrive. And so I was able to, like, learn that side of it as well, and kind of get introduced and then when the coaches kind of introduced like, okay, hey, we think, we think you should redshirt. There's a lot of girls in your position, but they were awesome. They're like, it's your decision, you know. And my mindset went to, I'm a failure. I'm not good enough, and I didn't know how to process. That like that was a that was my very first big roadblock of college, and so it just took some internal reflection of this is an opportunity and this isn't a setback. So I really had to shift how I thought in my mind. And once I looked at it as an opportunity, I had a great year, even though I didn't play because I had a more positive outlook on it. Of okay, I'm going to learn all the plays and I'm going to be ready for next year, or I'm going to get as strong as I can, or get in shape as a redshirt, I got to play on the scout team. So playing against my own teammates, let's say we're playing University of Iowa, I was pretending to be one of the Iowa players and do their tendencies. And so I learned a lot from that. I have an opportunity to be on the court and practice without any consequence, kind of, yeah, fair enough.

Todd Arkell  06:01

Did you? So? Did you come to the realization to turn it into a positive on your own? Or did you, was it maybe with the help of the of the mental performance coach, or conversations with other

Speaker 1  06:13

people, I would say, conversations with other people, of of trying to get perspective, leaning on on mentors and people who helped me get into this position of being a college athlete and having those, those kind of relate other people's relationships to help me and yeah, so not as much the mental like the sports psychologist, performance coach at the beginning, because I just, I felt like I didn't know as much about what services that offered. And as I continue to kind of go into some sessions or meet with them, I could understand more. Okay, this is what you guys do. So I had to learn myself, like, what is this all about? Because I don't know, yeah, and

Todd Arkell  06:57

I feel like it's anybody who's a, you know, teenage kid, you know, you're kind of like, oh, this is weird. Yeah, I always say that all the time. It feels like, you know, it feels very woo, woo or not, you know, we didn't do that where I'm from, or whatever, right? And how do you kind of start, start doing that? So, okay, so you get through all of that. And so how does winning edge coaching come to life? What sort of problem are you trying to solve that you're seeing, that maybe wasn't addressed, that you think you can help with?

Speaker 1  07:27

Totally so after I finished my master's program in sports science, I kind of did some reflection, took a step back, and just kind of looked at my whole basketball career from from start to finish, because I knew that after my master's program that like at the division two school, that was going to be my last year of basketball, I was going to put the shoes away, and I just thought back to how impactful it would have been if I would have known More about mindset in high school, and doesn't even have to be all the little nitty gritty details, but just to know what it is and the basic like, what is visualization? What is journaling? Like self talk, identity like just some some concepts that would have been nice to dive deeper into. So I could have stepped into my college experience just a little more ready and a little and a little more prepared. So that's the that's the hole I'm looking to fill is, let's, let's start these conversations a little earlier than college. Let's start them in high school and as youth athletes. And I think when I, when I look into youth athletics, now there's so many awesome strength programs. Like, if you're not in a strength program, what are you doing, right? And so I see, like, all this strength, and that's great, maybe a little bit nutrition is in there. But where's the mindset like that mindset, mindset should be taking just as seriously

Todd Arkell  09:03

you're preaching to the choir here. I mean, this podcast started from the fact that I was like, what a gap everybody's going skill, skill, skill, and the six inches between the years is where the game is made, right? Where the difference is made. And I think it's true. I love that perspective of, hey, just even getting people, that's where I'm, you know, you know, I say probably my listenership, when I kind of look at the demographics are probably like two thirds parents and a third athletes. I think it would be better if it was two thirds athletes or 100% athletes, but I think it's great for parents to kind of learn some of this stuff and maybe at least open the doors so to discuss these types of topics with their kids, so that they're sort of more open to it when it starts to present itself. But yeah, I think you know it the earlier you can sort of embrace some of that stuff. I think it can probably make you. Your enjoyment for your sport a little bit better. No question about it, when people hear mindset coaching, they often think, oh, it's motivational speakers and positive thinking. But like, how do you define it in a maybe a more practical way?

Speaker 1  10:17

That's a great question. I think that with mindset, looking at it from a sport setting, it's controlling your responses under pressure. It's it's not getting emotional. It's not it's not reacting. You're you have strategies. You have purposeful actions that are intact in place to handle whatever is in front of you. I think, I think that's where mindset stems from. Is kind of that response to adversity.

Todd Arkell  10:52

So what do you think is a common misconception that you see some of your clients or athletes that you work with and like? How do you how do you gently challenge that worldview that they may have?

Speaker 1  11:05

I feel like there's so much on social media these days of like things that young athletes are hearing and seeing, but it's like just going in one ear and out the other, or they're you're hearing a coach or a parent say, just have more confidence. Like, just get more confidence. But what does that mean? What is okay? Cool. I see that a lot with athletes of like, hey, my coach is telling me this, or my mom is telling me this, and it's like, okay, so we're here right now. We see where we want to be, get more confidence, but we don't have the stepping stones in place to get there. And I feel like people look at it as this big jump, of like, I gotta be, get more confidence. It's like, just start with one thing. Don't, don't make it this big mountain. Just do one thing consistently, one thing regularly. It takes time. It's, it's, I wish we could snap our fingers, and you probably wish so too, just for about

Todd Arkell  12:15

anything in life, we all think it would be really great if it happened right away.

Speaker 1  12:19

Yeah, like, it just, it takes time. I like, just, like, for a basketball athlete, like, I like to compare it to figure finding your shot, like, you're not going to make all your shots, and it's going to take time to get comfortable where you can just, it's rhythm, it's automatic and, and that's how like mindset training is too. You have to practice it.

Todd Arkell  12:45

That's one of the things I hear a lot from different kids. Oh, well, you know, I journal like, once a week, or I this, or I do this, everyone, you know, like, and it's like, it's, it just like building a muscle in the in the in the weight room. It doesn't happen from one day a week, you gotta, you gotta kind of stack, the stack the bricks. Personally, I feel like in mindset, work, language really matters in how you frame things. Are there any sort of, you know, I guess, phrases or approaches you used to that you try to intentionally avoid because you think it can be do more harm than good. What do you mean? Well, it's like, you know, you say, Oh, hey, be confident. You know, just kind of like, even that, be confident, like, and then it becomes a confusion point. Are there areas like, just different things you think that are probably best not said? And how do you try to guide, guide them in a different way, using different, different language?

Speaker 1  13:40

Yeah, when I think of that, I think of, like, self talk the way you're you're like, talking to yourself. And I really like to, like, hear what the athlete has to say first. Like, when we hop on a call, how's, how's the you can kind of pick up on the dialog. If it's like, you start the call. I did really bad. I missed a shot. I I can, you can, like, already tell the energy. You can feel the energy. It's very negative. It's very it's kind of pulling you down. So I like to really start with athletes. If we're in that, we're in that mindset, I'm like, okay, pause, pause, tell me three good things that happened from your practice or your game, or maybe it's the past week, like, let's start on a high note so we can acknowledge we are doing good things kind of start and start going in that direction, to have Some of that positivity, even even neutral thinking. I like to talk about, we're in positive or neutral, but we can't shift to negative, or if we do, we have to shift out of it. So I like to kind of take a pause when, when athletes kind of come, come with that energy, that mentality.

Todd Arkell  14:59

Did you talk. Talk to yourself when

Speaker 1  15:01

you were on the free throw line, definitely, what'd you say? So when I was growing up, my dad helped me learn how to shoot and he taught me, when you like, follow through it looks like a goose. And I don't know why, but he taught me goose. And so I would just take a deep breath and say goose. And that would kind of take me back to my middle school gym, where we shot 100 free throws, you know, where it was just us two. It took me back to a very simple moment, and not thinking about 10,000 people in the crowd, you know, just goose. And so having that kind of that makes me think of like having a reset word in the middle of a game, or kind of a power statement, an I am statement, I got this, I'm ready for this. You know, that's that's huge to be able to kind of have those quick hitter, powerful things that you can say in your head, or a reset. Having a reset button when you make a mistake, that was huge for me. I'm a very visual person. I love to learn visually, and so when I first learned in college about like having a reset, I would draw a circle on my my fist,

Todd Arkell  16:21

okay, yeah, like, a button

Speaker 1  16:23

out of Sharpie, like, I needed a physical button that I could, like, press, and that worked for me. And I think it's fascinating that when athletes really buy into this reset idea in a game, like, they find something that works for them and everyone's different. Maybe you got to shake your hands or touch the touch the grass, if you're a soccer athlete, or rub your hands together, or maybe it's a word that you're saying. I love helping athletes find what jives for them, because I had found something that worked for me, a button.

Todd Arkell  17:00

Yeah, that's awesome. Should have got a tattoo. Well, maybe, if it was now, you might have got a tattoo, little little reset written inside of the red button. That would

Speaker 1  17:13

have made it easier. I wouldn't have to take a Sharpie every game

Todd Arkell  17:16

so and you would have had a story to tell later in life, like, Why do you have that button on your hand? Well, you know, yeah, let me tell you about this. This is how we won the big 12 championship. I just pressed this a lot. What's a healthy way in your estimation to talk about failure that still kind of respects, you know, that competitiveness, that ambition, right? Like, you know, athletes, you know, I think they know that failure is part of it. But how do you kind of walk them through that so they can still remain, you know, sharp and wanting to go forward.

Speaker 1  17:54

Failure is a huge part of it. How I walk an athlete through failure is before we even get to the point where they're competing in a game or something, we write down goals, short term, medium, long term goals that we have, we can have a bigger picture of what are we shooting for, so we're not getting wrapped up in a momentary failure, and I don't, and I don't love the word failure, but like a mistake, I like to use mistakes, because I feel like failure is a trigger word.

Todd Arkell  18:32

I could see that, yeah,

Speaker 1  18:33

for some it depends, depends on who you are, but having the goals at the very beginning to know where we're at. I recently read a book called The Confident mind. Have you ever read it? I haven't. It's amazing. It's awesome. I'm reading it a second time because it there's just so much content. There's so much content in this book the confident mind, it promotes athletes to write down your 10 greatest moments in your sport ever, like, the top 10 the times you were the best athlete ever. And so I like to do that with my athletes, of like, write down the top 10. And then when we have a moment where there's a mistake or a failure, I encourage them to look back to those moments, like, remember your your top 10, like, this is just, this is just a dip on the roller coaster, and it's coming back up. But we have to, we have to pull ourselves up with our mind, you know, and not get bogged, bogged down by that. And I think it's just kind of a bigger perspective of you have to, you have to look beyond what's happening right now with with that mistake, or stop looking back. Let go of that. Let go of that, and look forward.

Todd Arkell  19:58

You know, you talked about identity. Earlier and kind of finding identity. How did that come about for you? And then how do you help try to teach that or draw that out of an athlete to like, Hey, you're you can be Morgan. And this is Morgan when you're not on the court. And this is, you know, the mamba mentality, or whatever you want to say. But where, how did you kind of find that, and then how do you help athletes kind of find that for themselves?

Speaker 1  20:23

Yeah, I feel pretty fortunate. I don't know about a lot of other university programs, but I know that with mine, we had an athlete class as I think it was maybe juniors and seniors, or maybe just seniors, but it was a class that talked kind of about how to phase out of college and what that looks like for your next step. And that's where I got introduced to like identity. And we took, I can't remember the name of it, but we took like an like a personality test to find out, like, what you're like, Who do you jive with? Who do you don't? And then it was applicable in, like, your your sport setting at the moment. But then we were also able to look forward to, okay, what does this look like in your next phase, whatever that is in work in, maybe some people were going professional in whatever that is. And then we talk through kind of finding identity and other things besides sport, you're you're more than just a basketball player, you're a daughter, you're a sister, you're a friend, you're what like, what else makes you, you, you. It's a it's an interesting topic to talk to high schoolers about, because I feel like in high school, your sport is your sport. That's all you're focused on. Maybe it's to go, like, to go to the collegiate level. I just feel like there's a lot more. I don't want to say narrow mindedness, but just kind of like, focus on yourself. Would you agree?

Todd Arkell  22:04

Kind of, yeah, I would. And I would think, you know what? Like, it's interesting. I mean, I live in Canada, and you're in America, and when I think of High School Sports, you're thinking Friday Night Lights and all those that, like in America, there is more more focus on the high school athletics than there is here. Now we have athletics outside of that, you know, with hockey and variety of other sports, but I think from a high school level, it's important, but it's not the biggest thing. Like, if you're a hockey player, you're not worried about your high school hockey team as much as you are playing in a league that you're in type of thing, right? But, yeah, I don't disagree with it. And I think if you have, I can remember going down as as a young hockey player, going down into the into the Philadelphia area. I think we were in Wilmington, Wilmington, Delaware, just outside and that they, they had the families of this team. We were playing bill at us, so we stayed with some of the families. And the kid that I stayed with, he was a player on the on the local high school football team. Well, we went to his school. They had a 10,000 seat stadium. We had two dads come watch us play high school football. I mean, I was like, Oh my God. Like they had more fields at the one school than they did in my whole city at all the schools. I was like, This is insane. Like, it was like, such a like, you see stuff like, even then, like, because, you know, I'm old, so, you know, like, you didn't see it as regular. But now it's like, even I, my son sent me a video when they were in Texas for baseball a couple summers ago, and he goes, Oh, check this place out. And he's, like, got a video, and he's showing it around. And I go, Oh, that's cool. What school is that? He goes, that's like, the local high school. And it was this, it looked like a d1 stadium. And I was like, You got to be kidding. You say it's like, I think it was Melissa Texas. I'm trying to remember. I was like, I was still even at this. Like, floored. So I can see the stakes being even higher playing when the whole town is there and, yeah, all your parents friends are there, and all your siblings friends, you know, it's like, it's got to be a different thing. And I can understand how that becomes your persona, right? Because even just, hey, I'm a really good student, that's my persona. I'm a good student, I'm a whatever it is. I'm a cheerleader, I'm a I'm a drama student, like all those things that I think they do become a very think when we're younger, we really identify with, like, maybe what we're good with, right and and don't really understand that there's kind of more to it that'd be fair.

Speaker 1  24:45

Yeah, definitely, yeah, I would agree with you. And so a big part of identity conversations is like, what other characteristics do you have? Like, what do you bring to the table, if basketball is taken away to. Tomorrow, what does, what does that look like? Or any sport, soccer, hockey, whatever, what makes you you? And I just think it takes some, just some, some good internal reflection, and it's good to look, look in the mirror like the more you know about yourself, the better you're going to be in the next step, whatever that step is for you

Matt Cundill  25:24

now more the mental approach with Todd Arkell,

Todd Arkell  25:28

I've got an episode coming shortly on imposter syndrome with it with the therapist that I that I know really well, and he we started talking about it just at a party. And I go, like, this is like. And he goes, Oh, we could do a whole episode on that. I go, I'm in. Let's do it. But yeah, I mean, like, where you kind of don't feel like, well, I'm, maybe I'm a bit of a fraud. I don't I'm not good enough, and all those different in how you kind of can work through that sort of piece, not not so much the fake it till you make it, but kind of like how you can try to remain confident in that as you're learning and kind of and kind of going through, as your philosophy of working with athletes changed at all since you sort of started, until now. Like, is there things that you go, Oh, I used to think that, and now I'm like, you know, I I think differently on a certain topic. Is there anything that's sort of changed, like at

Speaker 1  26:21

the beginning of of college, maybe end of high school, I just felt like in the weight room, it was just kind of balls to the walls, like, just go hard, do everything. Like, do the most, doing the most, and all gas, no breaks. I think, I think that's that was my mentality, and hey, it got me somewhere. But looking back of like, okay, maybe we needed to have a little balance, I feel like I am just extra mindful of that, or aware of that, even into my early years of coaching, I was, I was coaching on the side while being a college athlete, because I just wanted experience. I wanted hands on experience in a weight room, to get some experience, to have more on my resume than, yeah, I met an athlete, I kind of took that mentality going into my first year or so of a few years of coaching, of like, just like, go hard, go all out, do everything. And now I kind of look at it as little different of, maybe a more holistic approach of, how's our nutrition like? How are we fueling ourselves? How's recovery? Are we sleeping? Are we drinking water? How's our mindset? Are we are we good with ourselves? How are we doing, and not just looking at that, that strength side of it, of lift, heavy, go hard. So I would say I've taken more of a holistic approach to try and fill different buckets. I like to, I like to use this bucket analogy of looking at a high school athlete. What buckets are you currently filling? What What have you filled and what has Have you not given any attention to, or maybe little attention to? And how can we, how can we fill those and get a little bit more more balanced to be a well rounded athlete, a well rounded person, kind of connect all the dots instead of just picking two? Yeah, no.

Todd Arkell  28:20

100% so a lot of people talk about, you know, athletes today, they're soft. Coaches need to coach them differently. I mean, I don't think the kids are soft. I think that, you know, there's just kids respond to things a little bit differently now than than what they what they did you say? You talk about the, oh, they're an old school coach, which usually means maybe it's a, you know, maybe it's a little harsh. Where do you see the line between building resilience for athletes and then unintentionally, I'll say unintentionally, because that's probably being kind normalizing harmful environments, you know. So, you know, I'll see these things. Oh, yeah, we're gonna, you guys suck this weekend. You're gonna run suicides for an hour. That could maybe be a harmful environment, both physically and mentally. And so where do you kind of see that line on how you think coaches should deal with that?

Speaker 1  29:18

Oh, that's a, that's a really good question, kids, kids can handle some some toughness or like they can handle being coached hard? I, I don't know. I think the line gets crossed when you're attacking their character or who they are, and not the skills that have been shown on your designated sport area, arena, rink, whatever. I think when it when it gets to be kind of personal attacks, I think that draws the line. I think the lines drawn when, when we have maybe continual, irrational outburst.

Todd Arkell  29:57

Bobby Knight, yeah, I mean, there's a good. Example of continual outbursts. Yeah, yes.

Speaker 1  30:03

As a coach, you're an educator, and you're a teacher, no matter at what level. And it's important to push your athlete, those like athletes need to be pushed to be better. That's how you learn, then that's how you grow, but it needs to be in a way that's not degrading or continually putting you down, or like it's important for coaches to still have a relationship with them, and be able to sit down at the end of the day and say, Hey, I appreciate you. I'm glad you're on this team. Like, let's work through this. You know, instead of just yelling at them, you suck, you're awful. Go run and then, like, the conversation ends there. So I think that, like hard coaching is is good, but it's important to have a relationship too, with your athletes so they know, like, hey, like it's out of love, or like you care.

Todd Arkell  30:58

Yeah, I would agree with that. I mean, I think, you know, I came from an era where coaches, like, ran you through the ground basically, like as punishment. And I think, I just think punishment doesn't work. I mean, because you're not really, I don't know, yeah, physical punishment. I just even, even, obviously mental, mental punishment. But I just think, you know, often it becomes physical punishment. Like, I just even remember coaching tenu baseball, and we played this team, and the coach was a real ass hat, I'll use that word. And he was like, oh yeah, we lost last week, and I made them run polls for 45 minutes. And I'm thinking, they're freaking 10 like, that's gonna really make them want to, and it goes, we haven't lost since. I'm like, good for you, good for you.

31:46

Yeah, that's, that's what happened. That's why

Todd Arkell  31:49

I'm like, okay, so they're either a scared shitless B, it would, you know, like you could go on through all of it, but I just often you see it through somebody else's really bad behavior that you go, Yeah, might not want to do that, but yeah, I still think there's a lot of people out there. I've talked to parents, and they go, Well, there's things about the coach we don't love, but you know, he gets really good results. And I'm like, red flag. Just like, no, that's not, that's not how it should be, especially with youth sports, you gotta enjoy what you're doing, like you can't be scared to go to the rink or scared to go to whatever it is. Like you just can't. You can't have that kind of pressure. There's enough, I think there's enough pressure. I mean, I call it. People probably get tired of me saying it the professionalism of youth sports, right? Like, we're building these mini pros at such a young age, and we're just expecting them to do all this stuff, and they're just, like, not capable mentally. In a lot of cases, they're not mature enough. And that, that's, that's my thing, right? Like, I just kind of go, you know, that's why a podcast like this exists. It's like to say, Hey, these are, you know, by the way, that guy that has that podcast, he thinks that that's pretty stupid, you know how my coach behaves, and maybe I should tell somebody, because often parents don't know it. And I mean, I talked today to a guy I have a pair of met a glasses. I they're a toy, but I have them, and somebody was talking about and they go, oh yeah. It's been a real problem in the in the hockey leagues that coaches are are wearing these glasses in the dressing room, and they're like, recording stuff, and I'm like going, not, no, yeah. Again, red flag. I like going, like, okay, like, there's actually strict rules about uses of cell phones in the dressing rooms, even taking pictures of your own kids. So anyways, it's just there's a lot of these things that that go on, and I think sometimes, too that athletes are scared to maybe put their hand up and go, I don't think that's right. And I think we need to normalize, you know, normalize that, that it's okay to say, you know this, you know even I can just remember, even my son was playing hockey, had one coach that he wasn't always shitting on my son, but he was like, my son was upset that he was like, berating other kids on the team, right? Yeah, and didn't like that, so he kind of shared that with me, and I'm like, Hmm, file that one away. Let's, let's try to figure out how to deal with that in a more delicate way. Because I think people get concerned about, am I going to lose my spot on the team?

Speaker 1  34:28

Isn't it fascinating that it's becoming normalized? I love how you said that, like the professionalism of these youth sports, like you're 10, this is not how, how you should be growing up in your sport? No, and

Todd Arkell  34:45

I, you know, I can, I can imagine even like, I grew up in a small town. So I can imagine even like, if you're in a small town, big sport environment, you're like, Oh my God, if we push back against this coach, Johnny or Sally, gonna play. You know. Like, those types of things, which is really, that's a tough position to put parents in, to put kids in another episode coming up with a safe sport person. And so there's a whole lot of conversation around what that looks like. But, yeah, it's, it's, it's, I think it's a tough that's a tough thing to wrestle with.

Speaker 1  35:17

It deters you from the sport itself. It's like, oh, this is the only option. Okay, we're gonna we're gonna go do something else. And then you're losing athletes in a sport that they could pretend that they they loved or they like, and they want to grow more and learn more about it and develop as a young athlete in various skills. One more thing to share about that it makes me think into like my my days at Iowa State of I feel like a lot of coaches have the mentality of like, run them, if you mess up like, just run. And so at Iowa State, we wore these trackers in our undershirts and our strength and our strength and conditioning coach would track us throughout the practice. So let's say, let's say it's a practice, and she can see our workload. It takes into account how many, how many miles you're running, what's your heart rate. How many cuts are you like? How many turns are you making? Like? It tracks so many things, which is fascinating, and then it gives you a number of like. This is where your athletes at. And so maybe it's like, below 10, they're not working like, they're not working really hard. It's an easy practice. It's an easy practice, but maybe, if it's higher, obviously, that's a harder practice. And so we what was awesome in in college is our strength coach had a huge say into our practices. So she would meet with like the Head Coach and the coaching staff and say, like, last night's game was really tough, today needs to be an easy practice. And then she would track our numbers through practice and kind of say like, okay, so and so they're, they're reaching their limit of it's no longer becoming easy practice, you know, or stuff like that. And so our strength coach kind of had a say in easy, medium and hard practice days, and so she would be able to fluctuate it a little bit within reason, because she's not the coach. But I just found that fascinating in a in a division one environment, is a little more control and say, of like, okay, How tired are our athletes, or what is the recovery going to look like with a hard practice or a medium practice, just, just interest, interesting to something I had never experienced. 100 100% sensible.

Todd Arkell  37:50

What's one question you wish athletes ask themselves more often?

Speaker 1  37:55

What's my why? Why? Why do you do this every day? Why do you get up in the morning? Why do you get excited for practice? Why do you practice on your own? Why do you why do you keep coming back to it? I think that is something I love asking, Why? Why are you doing this? Because that's kind of the root of of any athlete, like, let's get, let's get to the heart of it, of your reason, because if you don't have a why, there's no reason to be in your sport. There's no reason to play like, go, try chess. Go try something else. Like, what's, what's your why, and and it changes. Your why changes throughout the years. My why in high school was different than my why in college. And I think that's that's a part of identity, like, Why? Why do you do this? Why? Why do you keep going back to it? So I like that question.

Todd Arkell  38:55

Sport got mindset and mental health, right? What would look different in the next five to 10 years? I'm just talking about, you know, athletes in general. I mean, just the whole athletic pursuit, like, if we get mindset and mental health right and we're focused on that, what changes? What looks different?

Speaker 1  39:16

Oh, okay, I was thinking, what looks different? Of like, teams are, teams are taking time before practice to, like, get their mind ready, or teams are taking time after practice to to have a journal, have just a little, a little paper, journal that they're writing down three good things that happened in their practice today, or one thing that they got better at today? So when I think of that question, I think of there is space in that athlete's world where it is normal to do. To some mindset training, or a strategy or a conversation, whether it's one on one with some a mental coach that's there, or the coaches are more involved in it, and block out time before practice or after practice, or everyone shoot me a text of your your goal for the week, or there's, there's just more, more things set in place. Because right now, I feel like some people know about about it. Some people don't. It's just kind of thrown out there. But I see, I see looking into the future, there's more accountability, and there's more follow through, and there's more buy in with it. I think

Todd Arkell  40:48

if you just normalize it a little bit more, it'll be, you know, people don't see it as being a weakness. I think in any way, it's like they're just trying to give themselves space to be able to process everything that's going on in their life, it would be, it would certainly be interesting. So what do you hope athletes remember about themselves long after the game is gone?

Speaker 1  41:09

I think I would hope that they are able to take something with them of so in sports, there's always adversity and there's always challenge, and that's a big part of sports, is learning how to overcome that and, like, shake it off, move on to the next one kind of thing, and finding your confidence from from that of, how do I dig myself out of this hole? Or you just missed three shots, but I'm going to make the next one, and I think that's very applicable when when sports is over, in life, in work, in relationships, in everything. And so I like to think working on your mindset in sports is going to help you in every way of life, whether you want to be the division one athlete or the d3 athlete, or you just want to play in high school and be a good athlete, every everything can take you into whatever next phase of of your life. Yeah, no, I,

Todd Arkell  42:20

I've always had the belief that athletic sets you up for just life in general, resilience, teamwork, accountability, being on time for shit that's gonna, you know, like, because if you weren't on time, well, back when I was playing, if you weren't on time, boy, you got that physical punishment, you know, like you had To do actually, I still, I just, I thought about one of my high school rugby coaches, Bill fell. He wasn't big on punishment, but when we would run three and a half miles to this park to train, so instead of training at the school on the field, he would run us, and it was uphill, and, you know, it was a fitness thing more than anything else, right? So we would run, and we would train, and I don't even remember, honestly, I don't remember how long practices were, but they were probably at least an hour, hour and a half. And then there was this hill, and you'd have to do six Hills before practice, before you'd head back, and the last one you had to carry a teammate on your back. And those were, like, killer I just remember it was always like looking for the skinniest guy to carry, you know, like, Go, don't give me the great big 250 pound kid. I can't do that, right? And so you'd have to complete that. Then you had to jog back to the school. And the only thing was, you couldn't finish behind him, so he ran with you, right? So it was like he ran too. So it was probably his way of getting in some exercise. But you know what it was like if you finished behind him, you had to do laps on the track afterwards, right? And so it would always be, some of us would, if you were tired, you'd hang back, you know, kind of near him, and then you'd start kicking it into a big sprint as you got close to the school. So, you know? And I just, I remember that a lot, right? Just, but the discipline of doing that day in, day out, and I can tell you, I remember we were like such a fit. He said, You guys aren't the biggest, most physical athletes, but you're going to outrun everyone, like, you're going to last a game and, you know? And he was right, like, he kind of instilled that in us. So, you know, I just say those are the types of things that, you know, having a goal and following through with that, and all the different things you had to do. I mean, those types of things stay with you, right? Like, I don't know. I tell my son the other day, it was like we were doing something, and it kind of went sideways. And he goes, Oh, this sucks. And I go, Yeah, I know. I go, you hear me saying anything? He goes, No. I go, sometimes you just gotta just bite your tongue. Get through. Do it, get it over, get the task at hand done, and you can bitch about it later, right? But it's like during the in the moment, let's just focus on getting it done and moving forward with it. And I said, you know, like, that's and I think those are things that that, that sports give us, right, like that, that sort of, that grit, that they talk about, that resilience, whatever it is like you learn that there might be more inside you to give than you think there is. Sometimes totally,

45:29

I love that word grit.

Todd Arkell  45:31

What's something if you were to say to an athlete right now, somebody listened to this, you said, Hey, here's one thing you could do, like right now. That'd be really simple. They would kind of start you on the path to being focused more on your mindset. What would

Speaker 1  45:47

that be? I have to okay, just self talk. How are you how are you talking to yourself in those on those moments? Are you saying, this sucks, this is terrible. Are you saying, All right, let's, let's do this. Or, like, let's get through this. It's the simple shift in your language, I think is, is very powerful and, like, it doesn't take much. Instead of saying, I can't do this, say I can. It's, it's a simple shift, I'd also say one other thing that is visualization. I think that's something that any athlete can start doing. Takes two minutes. Do it while you're in bed, before, like before you go to bed, or just close your eyes. Just visualize. Visualize yourself in your sport. Visualize what you're doing good, visualize. You can even visualize a mistake, and how do you react to that mistake? But just visualization, I think, is very powerful and maybe not tapped into as much.

Todd Arkell  46:55

I always ask some of these questions, what's a book you could recommend? We think we know confident mind is one of them? Is there any other books you'd recommend people to read?

Speaker 1  47:04

I like books I'm getting. I'm getting into books of just kind of this topic and stuff that we talk about. I like the book. It takes, what it takes. Have you read that one I have

Todd Arkell  47:15

and it's been recommended? I actually have a whole I have a whole list of 18 months worth of book recommendations from individuals that I'm going to publish soon. So, yes,

47:24

okay, I want to see that list. Yeah, 100%

Todd Arkell  47:27

I thought it would be kind of cool eventually, because I just started asking. Then I go, wow, there's like, quite a swing. You know, there's, there's all kinds of things out there. What's best advice you ever received? Believe in yourself.

Speaker 1  47:39

The only one that can do it is you. Your coach can't do it, your parents can't do it, your friend can't do it. You have to do it. And I'd also say, take advantage of an opportunity, or someone else is going to take it for you very good. That's something I heard in college and just kind of punched me in the gut, of if I don't take it some someone else is going to take that opportunity.

Todd Arkell  48:03

Yeah, that's fair. What would you tell 13 year old you

Speaker 1  48:09

work on your mindset, learn how to handle pressure better. Fair enough, I would tell 13 year old me, it's not about perfection, it's about consistency. Love it. That was a huge thing of just trying to be perfect in everything, even into my I talk about this a lot. Into my freshman year of college, I was trying to be perfect, and every time I missed or made a mistake, it was the end of the world for me in my own head. I just put that into my head so it's consistency wins over perfection.

Todd Arkell  48:46

Absolutely perfect. Morgan, thank you so much for the time. It's been a pleasure chatting with you. And for those who want to follow up with Morgan, all her information will be in the show notes when this gets published to air. Thanks so much.

49:02

Great. Thank you so much. Todd, thanks for

Matt Cundill  49:04

listening for more, including resources and more about the show. Go to the mental approach.com A production of the sound off media company. You.